How to not hold on to sanity

A458C7C6-1A34-445F-AAB7-DEF018AE0583I get into the most trouble when I try to hold on. It doesn’t matter what it is: an idea, a thought, a feeling, a relationship, an experience- none of it serves the ME in the end. What’s harder? Trying to let go? Trying to let go of: an idea, a thought, a feeling, a relationship, an experience- either way, the cluster fuck seems to be in the “trying”.

Could it be the ME is drawn to self-imposed suffering; a non-stop, commercial-free, one way fearful trip to a future that never arrives?

I live an extraordinary life and yet I wake up to battle everyday. I don’t give myself a break until hours after I’m conscious. Sometimes, I’m relieved that in 20 years I’ll probably get to punch my time card for the last time and retire to the Afterlife. I put in my time on Earth. I won’t be needing a gold Apple watch either.

There is respite. Today,

I find comfort in my  thoughts or they can be my worse enemy.

When my mind is searching around, waiting to land on the roulette wheel of emotions, I can easily fall to existential angst or the latest shooting/attack/atrocity (#Munich #CharlesKinsey #TrumpSpeech) for suffering solace. Or perhaps because the first love encounter you are writing for your character turns into a sexual assault.

Perhaps the trick is forging ahead (“just keep swimming”) and keep that augmented reality in the background.

Perhaps I have to let go of this notion.

7/24/16

[BLOG # 10 #SummerSocialMediaSabbatical #TheAntiSocialSocialExperiment #SocialMediaSummerSabbatical ]

 

Mental health, the criminal justice system, and how I blame Elayne Boosler

Yesterday, I did something out of the norm. I sent two letters out. Both to prisons. Both to men in their 20’s, serving time for violent crimes. One for 13 years. One for life. They both suffer from severe mental illness. One is a friend’s son and one is an ex-client. Neither could get proper help on the “outside”.  Neither is getting help on the “inside” – the justice system and these privatized institutions do not deal with “crazy”. Why should they?

Only 15-20% of Police forces in the country have crisis intervention officers specializing in mental health. [Nightline: 7.22.16]

I have a close friend on Twitter with PTSD who just bought a gun. She sounds angry and out of touch- a lot. Today she’s TRUMPED up by the fear mongering. We are to believe we need to treat these pockets of horrific violence militarily, not as the law enforcement or mental health issue and gun proliferation that it is. We ignore the roots and want quick easy answers.

I wonder if we’ll ever be able to connect the dots to sanity in this country?

 

On another Note-A Confession: I cheated this week and went onto Facebook. I went to check on a friend and came across an Elayne Boosler Game. How could I resist? I checked Twitter today too and even posted via an anonymous account. #Munich #MichaelKinsey #RNC #damn

 I still blame Elayne Boosler for my Social Media Sabbatical slide.

[blog # 9 #AntiSocialSocialMediaExperiment #SummerSocialMediaSabbatical]